Predictions for the end of the comicbook(Jokingly) [Archive] - Forums

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Now I Know...
01-28-2005, 08:02 PM
So with all the rumors floating about I thought we could use a few more.

Well not real ones,but to relieve some of the sky is falling syndrome were having I took a poke at some funny if not totally stupid what if style looks at where our favorites might end up.

Feel free to add you own.Here's my predictions:

-The Tempest is gonna be used to kill continuity.

-Blaylock is really a Crimson Guardsman.

-Issue 45 will have Snake Eyes merging with Optimus Prime.Snake Prime!

-The Red Shadows will only be a threat for a week to ten days.It's basically all the women in the Joe universe with PMS.

-The Baroness,Wraith,and Destro's unborn child will become one character.Kid Wraitheness! Sexy,stealthy,and completely homicidal. And it has both sexs.

-Someone dies,and comes back,and then switch's sides,then dies.Maybe.

-Four words:Hawk becomes Robo Joe.

-The Pitt reopens near the Jersey shore,but closes shortly after,and reopens as a minature golf coarse.Pitt Putt.

-Cover Girl falls in love with Bazooka.

-Bazooka works his pimphand,and moves not only Cover Girl into his bed,but Jinx as well.Making him officially cooler than Snake Eyes!

-Zartan and the Dreadnoks leave the life of crime behind,and become Mr.T like role models.They land a hit show for NBC.The Z team!

-Dr.Mindbender steps into a quantum accellerator and leaps from person to person tring to set time right.

-Tomax and Xamot take over hosting duties for The Apprentice.

-Firefly contiues to offer his services to the highest bidder,and becomes Paris Hilton's personnal body guard,but gets fired when he stuffs a grenade in every hole of Nicole Richie and pulls the pins because he can't stand that babbling *****.

-Duke writes his autobiography :They didn't ask,I didn't tell.Now you know....

-Roadblock,Shipwreck,and Gung-Ho open a restaurant.It's a big hit.Chain stores open everywhere.Mysteriously it's called 'The Greenshirt'?

-Jerwa goes on to become a near god.Not a god or THE god,but a near god.Which intitles him to unlimited chocolate pudding,and amazing ping pong skills,but little else.Which is ok with him since he's doing well with his writing career,and band.

-Destro freaks out and joins Motley Crue killing uhmmmm...replacing Vince Neil,they rack in billions of dollars with their album 'The world through a steel mask'.Destro gets more trim than he could possibly count.2 women at a time,then 3,4 with toys......

-Rock-n-Roll goes back to Cali,Cali,Cali,no I don't think so.

-Billy moves to San Francisco.Apparently being raised by a psychotic,trained by ninja,brainwashed and whatnot caused a few issues.He's been working at a rape counsel center.As the janitor.

-Kamakura is using his ninja skills in Iowa.He farms corn.

-The Flint and Lady Jaye variety show is a disaster.They divorce.Flint becomes CEO of Disney,the company is doing well with the addition of such animated films inspired from his military days,like The Littlest Army Boot,and Herbie goes Ballistic! He's dating Lindsey Lohan.

-Lady Jaye works in Hollywood her gifted skills have made her one of Hollywoods most sought after actresses.She's currently filming Dead Man Walking 2.

-Spirit was never heard from again.

-Stalker is proud of his son,he's been offered the anchor spot of NBC Nightly News.Stalker is running for mayor of Detroit.Looks like he'll win too.He promises to clean up the streets,I believe him.

-Heavy Duty got a pretty good job he's been Al Sharptons bodyguard for some time now.

-Snow Job is serving 8 to 10 for income tax evasion.

-Larry Hama continued to come up with good ideas,but was widely ignored.Shame really cause in the year 3022 his work outsells Shakespear.

-Dialtone remains a geak.He live in his elderly parents home.In the basement.On the door to the basement is a cruddly made sign that says The Pitt.He still isn't dating.

-Scrap Iron still blows things up,but these days it's balloons.He's a clown for childrens parties now,and damn talented as a balloon animal artist.

01-29-2005, 10:02 AM
i love it